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Saturday, October 20, 2012
Sunday, May 20, 2012
Facebookless in a Facebook World
The other day a new reality came into play for me. I no longer have a Facebook account.
Let me start by saying this was not my decision...initially. It was made for me by Facebook. As I tried to login I was greeted with a message and subsequent email that stated I am no longer "eligible" to use Facebook and that my profile has been disabled. I have no idea why or how this happened and am almost 100% sure this was done in error. But after several emails to Facebook with no response I have came to the conclusion they don't seem care.
Let me start by saying this was not my decision...initially. It was made for me by Facebook. As I tried to login I was greeted with a message and subsequent email that stated I am no longer "eligible" to use Facebook and that my profile has been disabled. I have no idea why or how this happened and am almost 100% sure this was done in error. But after several emails to Facebook with no response I have came to the conclusion they don't seem care.
Yes...I will admit I was a little bummed and actually said to myself "what am I going to do now with out Facebook?!"
BUT...I have came to the refreshing conclusion that I don't need Facebook. What I am choosing to do now is to focus on and improve my real face to face interpersonal relationships with others. It's so easy to lose the intimacy of authentic friendships when u have the buffer of the internet and Facebook between you.
BUT...I have came to the refreshing conclusion that I don't need Facebook. What I am choosing to do now is to focus on and improve my real face to face interpersonal relationships with others. It's so easy to lose the intimacy of authentic friendships when u have the buffer of the internet and Facebook between you.
My hope is to take this oportunity to be intentional in my relationships with others by showing compassion for their lives and care for their well being. I want to show people that I truly care about them and have compassion for them no matter what. I want to be present, real and authentic in my relationships.
Focusing on authentic relationships is what living a life of compassion is all about. It is what unconditional love is built upon. Love with out conditions. Yes...I just threw the love word out there. I am not afraid of what you may think because that is who I am and how I live my life. As someone who has a faith and hope in Jesus Christ, living a life of compassion and unconditional love is my desire and whom I'm called to be.
I am tired of just coasting by and living selfishly for myself. I desire to be used by God for something bigger. So thank you Facebook for re-opening my eyes to the simple fact that real face to face relationships matter. In fact I am probably better off with out Facebook. I am can now focus on being real, intentional, present and authentic in my relationships. I don't have to worry about presenting an image on a profile or a post that may not reflect the true me. God created me to be honest and humble and now it is my job to live that in the most authentic manner I can. It is my prayer that unconditional love, honesty, integrity and humility are the root and basis of who I am. I hope that others see those qualities in me and desire to live there lives that way as well.
I am tired of just coasting by and living selfishly for myself. I desire to be used by God for something bigger. So thank you Facebook for re-opening my eyes to the simple fact that real face to face relationships matter. In fact I am probably better off with out Facebook. I am can now focus on being real, intentional, present and authentic in my relationships. I don't have to worry about presenting an image on a profile or a post that may not reflect the true me. God created me to be honest and humble and now it is my job to live that in the most authentic manner I can. It is my prayer that unconditional love, honesty, integrity and humility are the root and basis of who I am. I hope that others see those qualities in me and desire to live there lives that way as well.
Tuesday, March 27, 2012
Pursuit of a Dream
The pursuit of a dream. Living for something other that myself. It's what I need to wake up and start doing every single day of my life. I dream to impact this world in so many ways. One of the my dreams is to make a difference in peoples lives...even if it's just in the life of one person.
I have found that it's a dream and desire of mine to open my heart and share the amazing love and grace that I've been given. There is this man that I follow whose name is Jesus Christ. I let him into a broken, dark heart of mine over a decade and a half ago and asked Him to be the center and focus of my life. With out a doubt it was by far the best decision I have ever made in my life. He and His love is the standard that I try to live my life up to every single day. He had a love for humanity that was so unconditional that it absolutely blows my mind. He died for that amazing love. If I can share that amazing unconditional love of Christ with just one person...I am beginning the fulfillment of my life's dream. Loving, helping and serving others while meeting them where they are at in life is the how this dream starts.
The unspoken question that now lies in front of me is... How do I accomplish this dream? The answer begins with a renewed focus and the right frame of mind. It takes true humility and laying my pride and personal selfish desires aside. If I want to make a positive difference in the life of someone else I need to trust and follow the love and example of Jesus. There are many who hurt, lack basic necessities of life and desire the compassion and love that everyone human longs for. It's my desire and dream to come along side and supply that love with out condition. I hope to freely give unconditional love when it is needed most. I desire to invest and join a hurting person and lovingly journey through life with them...not just give them a hand shake and a word of encouragement and wish them well. I don't want to apply a quick mediocre fix to a long term issue. I have the desire to be there for the long haul and show the true love of Christ that this world is missing and so desperately desires.
I know I don't have all the answers to accomplish these dreams and desires but I do know there is a dreaming, compassionate, somewhat sensitive side me that I can not ignore. If you know me, you know that I wear my heart on my sleeve for all to see. Most guys wouldn't say that but it is who I am and I am not ashamed of it. At heart I have always been a dreamer. I am a guy who is filled with passion, faith and a desire to understand. I am always trying to think outside the small brain of mine and figure out life. The love of Christ has helped me to do just that by allowing me to open my heart and let unconditional love pour out.
My dream. My desire. My life.
Thursday, March 22, 2012
Authentic and Real
Real and authentic.
Who are you? Who are you trying to be? Do these two words describe you. I hope
they describe me.
There are some basic
truths in my life that I can state with the utmost honesty and authenticity.
I don't have all the
answers but I do know that I have tried at times to be someone I'm not. I've
tried to make myself into a person who I think others will like. I've tried to
make myself more appealing to others...whether it be a close friend or someone I
just met for the first time. People don't want me to be just like them...they
want me to be myself. I hope people want to be my friend because they like me
for who I am and not for who I am trying to be.
So here is my
resolution...I need to just be me.
The fact is that we
all need to be real and authentic in everything that we do...our thoughts,
words and actions. The following is a list of who I am. The real me. The real
and authentic Tim. Yes the good...and the bad. This list could go on forever
but I will leave you with with just a few.
'Simple Truths of Who
I Am'
I am man.
I am a child of
God.
I love my saviour
Jesus with every ounce of my being.
I am a single father.
I love my children
more than words.
I have a large heart
that I wear on my sleeve far to often but it is who I am and I am not ashamed.
I love life...who
doesn't? There isn't much in life that can bring me down or at least keep me
down for long.
I am filled with
hope.
I pray that I am a man
of integrity and honor.
I am an eternal
optimist...I try to find the best in every situation.
Unconditional love is
what I live my life by.
With all humility I
truly enjoying serving other people.
I am filled with
complete and overwhelming joy when I see that I have made others happy.
I desire adventure.
I am a hopeless
romantic.
I am a dreamer.
I am moved in my soul
by the beauty of words, music, art and nature.
Yet...
I am sinful because I
am human.
I am broken...but God
has made me whole.
I struggle.
I am not perfect.
I have made many
mistakes.
I wish I could go back
and correct my mistakes but I admit they have helped shaped me into who I am
today.
I have been hurt.
I have hurt others.
I don't like hurting
others.
I have been fake.
I have not been real.
I am sorry.
I deserve Hell but
Jesus in my heart has given me eternity in heaven.
and.....
I try everyday to be
real and authentic in everything I do...in every thought, word and action.
Monday, March 05, 2012
'The Resolution'
Twelve men. United. Pursuing honor, integrity, compassion and courage.
These are the words that describe a group of men that I have chosen to associate myself with. A group of men that I am honored to know and lucky to belong to. They are my friends, my brothers and the men I choose to tackle the issues of life and fatherhood with. They are my small group. They are my Single Dads small group from the amazing body of believers that is called Northstar Church.
The reason I write about them is because we are addressing and tackling an issue that is so extremely important to us and to society as a whole. It is the issue of raising our children in a home where a father is Godly, loving, ever-present, influential, courageous and filled with integrity and honor. I know I have written about this in the past but this issue is so vital and detrimental to the future well being of our children that it deserves clarity and expansion.
I have to make something clear though. I will be the first to admit that I am not perfect. I struggle and I sin. I am a broken human being saved by God's amazing grace through faith in Jesus Christ. I believe that every single dad in my group will fully admit to the exact same truth about themselves. It's vital to understand that fact in order to achieve what we are trying to accomplish.
We are striving and resolving to live 'The Resolution'. It's a commitment and a resolve that we as fathers and men of courage are choosing to live our lives by. It is living a higher standard of faith, family and fatherhood. Sound familiar? Yes...we have seen the film 'Courageous'. Yes...we were extremely moved by it. Yes...many tears rolled down my cheeks. And yes...it was our inspiration. But 'The Resolution' is something so much bigger than just an idea in a film or a book. It is real life to us men...to us single fathers. It is a turning point in our ordinary selfish lives that we have been living so casually. We are committing, trusting AND faithfully asking God to lead us in this journey. We are choosing to do more than just taking the easy way out. We are choosing the road less traveled. We are committing to the hard way. We are sacrificing our selfish desires for the benefit of our children. We are placing our faith first. We are placing God first in our lives followed by our children. We WILL be present in their lives. We WILL be the spiritual leaders of our children. We WILL "win the hearts" of our children. In a society so lacking of loving fathers and men of integrity and honor...we WILL be the difference for our children.
This journey will not be easy. And it is not something to be taken lightly. We must be held accountable. YOU must hold us accountable. I for one do not want to fail. With my kid's spiritual and emotional well-being at stake...I can not fail. We can not fail. That is why I pray...why we pray. It will take discipline, sacrifice and faith to continually live out 'The Resolution.' We will turn to the wise words of the Apostle Paul..."Be alert; stand firm in the faith; be men of courage; be strong. Do everything in love." (1 Corinthians 16: 13-14)
So where are you men, fathers, single dads and husbands? Stand up and take this journey with us! Be men of courage! Make the choice, commit and decide to live a life far greater than the one you are currently living! Live for your children, your spouse and most importantly for God! Live 'The Resolution.'
I DO solemnly resolve before God to take full responsibility for myself, my wife, and my children.
I WILL love them, protect them, serve them, and teach them the Word of God as the spiritual leader of my home.
I WILL be faithful to my wife, to love and honor her, and be willing to lay down my life for her as Jesus Christ did for me.
I WILL bless my children and teach them to love God with all of their hearts, all of their minds, and all of their strength.
I WILL train them to honor authority and live responsibly.
I WILL confront evil, pursue justice, and love mercy.
I WILL pray for others and treat them with kindness, respect, and compassion.
I WILL work diligently to provide for the needs of my family.
I WILL forgive those who have wronged me and reconcile with those I have wronged.
I WILL learn from my mistakes, repent of my sins, and walk with integrity as a man answerable to God.
I WILL seek to honor God, be faithful to His church, obey His Word, and do His will.
I WILL courageously work with the strength God provides to fulfill this resolution for the rest of my life and for His glory.
Wednesday, February 29, 2012
Single Dad Manifesto
Fatherhood...being a great and loving father...being the spiritual leader of my children...being a man of courage. These thoughts and convictions have been on my heart for some time now. I have been waiting for my heart to cohesively communicate with my brain so that you may understand what I thinking and feeling.
As most of you know...I am a single dad raising two elementary school aged children. I love my kids more than words can describe. I am forever blessed and changed by having Sam and Hannah in my life. I am a better human being because of my children. Being a single dad can be very challenging yet extremely rewarding. Raising my two children by myself wasn't a choice I made but it's a part of my life that I accept and that I am more than happy to have. I am challenged everyday in this endeavor but through patience, love and faith in my best friend Jesus... I am able to do it.
I have came to the conclusion that there are a lot of dads out there not stepping up to the plate of fatherhood. Don't get me wrong...there are a lot of great men being the fathers that are desired and expected of them. But...and this is a big BUT...there are far too many men lacking in the fatherhood department. To be clear I am not perfect either...I make mistakes too. I am not writing this about them though. I am writing this about me. About who I want to become. About who I strive to become everyday. Simply stated...i desire to be the most loving and compassionate dad I can be to my children.
I want to tell u about a goal of mine. That goal is to be the father that my kids deserve, need and desire from the depths of their little hearts. I want to be the father that my children never forget. I want to be the father that my children will always look to for guidance, love and compassion. I pray that I can build my children up with wisdom and love...and not tear them down with hurtful words. I pray that my kids can look back when they have children of their own and be proud of the father I was. That's a BIG goal. It is a life long never-ending goal. I goal that I am striving and determined to fulfill. Its goal that I can not do on my own. It takes prayer, discipline and faith in my God...my Jesus.
I get on my knees and pray that I can do ALL the things I just said. I pray that I can fulfill my goals. I pray that God will make the impossible possible. I pray that other fathers and men have the same desire to become the men who this society so desperately needs. Men of love, compassion, wisdom and courage. It starts with us...with what's deep down in our hearts. But it also takes you the reader...the wife...the mother...the friend to help us become the men and fathers we are called to be and desire to be.
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Fatherhood
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